So I have been recently told, by more than one person, that my blog is boring. Nobody cares about what my dogs do or what Michael does except me. This is quite sad considering only about 4 people read my blog. 50% of the people read this only out of mere obligation or boredom…probably more likely the latter… So while my topics are wildly hysterical to me… I will change my focus in hopes of better entertaining my 4 friends who are extremely bored at work (or in Ashley’s case should be studying ;0)).
This blog may be misleading. I assure Michael and the dogs do not constitute all of my time or interests….So let’s talk about me a little more…
My top three interests right are works in progress…
Cooking
Gardening
Shagging
I can do none of these three things, but dammit I am trying! HA!
Michael and I just started intermediate shag lessons (I got the beginner lessons for Christmas, b/c yes I was that bad…). And I think slowly but surely I am getting there. Poor Michael though…. He has the patience of a saint. He was a good shagger before all of this, so he has to go through the motions while this poor white girl with NO rhythm tries to pick up the moves. Last night we learned the sugar foot. Looks cool – like we actually know what we are doing. After multiple nights of practice I am gonna be ready to show off at the next wedding! :0)
As for the cooking…. PLEASE SEND ANY TIPS, SUGGESTIONS, RECIPES…. I am working with nothing in this area…. Hahahahahahhahaha
Gardening – I think I am slowly but surely developing a green thumb. I currently have planted (at Michael’s house of course – it’d be quite tragic in pots on my apt. patio):
Like 20 tomato plants ( I mean one of has to yield something right??? The odds of probability…)
Cucumbers…nothing yet but flowers
Cayenne Peppers – 2 big peppers so far – just waiting on them to turn red!
Sweet Banana Peppers – Michael has already sliced the one produced and eaten it on a salad
Citronella – you wouldn’t believe the amount of misquotes in his back yard
Lavender – also a misquote (and tick) repellent – for the dogs!
Pimento – like the one’s in pimento cheese…yummmmm
And tons of herbs (basil, oregano, but the green onions have already died…wah wah…)
Wish me luck!
I will try to make this more interesting and humorous for those of you reading….
Thursday, June 11, 2009
Tuesday, June 9, 2009
The One with the Crazy Dogs and Lessons Learned…
As previously mentioned Michael and I spent an entire week on Hilton Head Island at the end of June. Harley and Gus had been doing pretty good together lately, and we just didn’t have money to board them, so we had the genius idea to just leave them in that back yard (with access to a covered area to get out of the rain) for the week and a friend of mine would come by a couple times a day to feed and water them. It was going to be perfect and it was perfect until Sunday afternoon…. (side note we left on Saturday afternoon)
My friend who was watching the dogs called me Sunday afternoon in a panic. On the verge of tears she says, “Suzanne, I am standing here in Michael’s backyard holding Harley’s collar and Gus is sitting beside me, but Harley is no where to be found. I have looked around this whole yard and I see no way that he could have gotten out!” Blind-sided by this information I told her I needed a few minutes to process this and I would have to call her back – a reaction didn’t come immediately….
My thoughts at the moment were “oh ghudda!!” (this phrase is also my attempt to learn Arabic ;0) ) Then, ohmygosh his collar is off, whoever finds him will have no way of contacting us or letting us know where he is. Then, oh great we got him from Project Pet if the Pound picks him up he goes back to Project Pet and away from us forever – stupid contract! Then, how am I ever going to find this dog while I am in Hilton Head and my poor friend is dealing with all of this. Then, ohmygosh Michael and I are going to have leave, drive back to Columbia, get the dogs situated, and come back to Hilton Head. Then, oh great Michael is out in the middle of the ocean fishing and I am going to have deal with this by myself.
Fortunately, in the middle of all of this mental chaos my friend calls me back to let me know that Harley has just sauntered back into the front yard as if nothing was wrong at all… My poor friend! I could tell she was stressed out and irritated with my dogs. I would be and I love them! So I thought, good - crisis averted and told her to just put them in the kitchen and she could just come over a few times a day and let them out. This should have been fine since this is how they have lived their lives while we are at work.
WRONG!!
That very same night I get yet another frantic phone call from my friend. She had been nice enough to go over there one more time that evening to let them potty before bed, only to walk in on a DISASTER area….
Harley and Gus had gotten into the flour and rice. My friend said that flour was ALL OVER the kitchen and poor (I use that term lightly- as he was really the co-conspirator) Gus was no longer a black lab, but a stark white lab with the flour “caked” to his face. There was dried rice all of the floors (we are still finding it in various nooks and crannies of the kitchen) and Lord only know how much of it they ate. On top of all of this, my poor friend had put these two crazy mutts outside while she cleaned all of this up and Harley got away for the second time that day. Fortunately, just like before, he came right back.
In fear of her sanity, I told her to just put them in the house and I would call my Aunt to come and get them. Which is exactly what happened. My aunt came and got them and they were boarded for the rest of the week…coming full circle to the entire thing we were trying to avoid…
Then, as pay back for boarding them for a week, they gave us a whole new set of issues to worry about after we returned from Hilton Head. As I said before, by this time I had moved out, so these were Michael’s stories that I am sharing with you….
Feeling that as the owner of these creatures and knowing their tricks he could secure them safely on the porch while he was at work all day, Michael did just that. (It was too soon after the event to test out the backyard again). Day one - fine, no problems at all. Day two and three great. But day four…. Oh day four….
Apparently about 2 o’clock Michael got a phone call from the neighbor saying she had Harley and he needed to come get him. So Michael left work and went to the neighbor’s house to get Harley. As he was getting out of the truck the neighbor assumed that Harley listend and would go straight to Michael. Again… WRONG… He took one look at Michael and one look at the other end of the street and BOLTED… So there is Michael running down the street in dress shoes and tie chasing after Harley. Luckily, Harley simply decided to stop running and turn and come to Michael. He was able to get him back to the house and in to the kitchen and back to work all before a 2:30 client call… Pretty impressive!
Enter me.
That evening I arrive at Michael’s house, before he does, to find that while in the kitchen again the dogs of gotten into the trash, shredded and distributed it all over the place, AND eaten 5 months worth of Heartguard. Fun…
If I didn’t love them like they were my children…. I’d hate them… :0)
My friend who was watching the dogs called me Sunday afternoon in a panic. On the verge of tears she says, “Suzanne, I am standing here in Michael’s backyard holding Harley’s collar and Gus is sitting beside me, but Harley is no where to be found. I have looked around this whole yard and I see no way that he could have gotten out!” Blind-sided by this information I told her I needed a few minutes to process this and I would have to call her back – a reaction didn’t come immediately….
My thoughts at the moment were “oh ghudda!!” (this phrase is also my attempt to learn Arabic ;0) ) Then, ohmygosh his collar is off, whoever finds him will have no way of contacting us or letting us know where he is. Then, oh great we got him from Project Pet if the Pound picks him up he goes back to Project Pet and away from us forever – stupid contract! Then, how am I ever going to find this dog while I am in Hilton Head and my poor friend is dealing with all of this. Then, ohmygosh Michael and I are going to have leave, drive back to Columbia, get the dogs situated, and come back to Hilton Head. Then, oh great Michael is out in the middle of the ocean fishing and I am going to have deal with this by myself.
Fortunately, in the middle of all of this mental chaos my friend calls me back to let me know that Harley has just sauntered back into the front yard as if nothing was wrong at all… My poor friend! I could tell she was stressed out and irritated with my dogs. I would be and I love them! So I thought, good - crisis averted and told her to just put them in the kitchen and she could just come over a few times a day and let them out. This should have been fine since this is how they have lived their lives while we are at work.
WRONG!!
That very same night I get yet another frantic phone call from my friend. She had been nice enough to go over there one more time that evening to let them potty before bed, only to walk in on a DISASTER area….
Harley and Gus had gotten into the flour and rice. My friend said that flour was ALL OVER the kitchen and poor (I use that term lightly- as he was really the co-conspirator) Gus was no longer a black lab, but a stark white lab with the flour “caked” to his face. There was dried rice all of the floors (we are still finding it in various nooks and crannies of the kitchen) and Lord only know how much of it they ate. On top of all of this, my poor friend had put these two crazy mutts outside while she cleaned all of this up and Harley got away for the second time that day. Fortunately, just like before, he came right back.
In fear of her sanity, I told her to just put them in the house and I would call my Aunt to come and get them. Which is exactly what happened. My aunt came and got them and they were boarded for the rest of the week…coming full circle to the entire thing we were trying to avoid…
Then, as pay back for boarding them for a week, they gave us a whole new set of issues to worry about after we returned from Hilton Head. As I said before, by this time I had moved out, so these were Michael’s stories that I am sharing with you….
Feeling that as the owner of these creatures and knowing their tricks he could secure them safely on the porch while he was at work all day, Michael did just that. (It was too soon after the event to test out the backyard again). Day one - fine, no problems at all. Day two and three great. But day four…. Oh day four….
Apparently about 2 o’clock Michael got a phone call from the neighbor saying she had Harley and he needed to come get him. So Michael left work and went to the neighbor’s house to get Harley. As he was getting out of the truck the neighbor assumed that Harley listend and would go straight to Michael. Again… WRONG… He took one look at Michael and one look at the other end of the street and BOLTED… So there is Michael running down the street in dress shoes and tie chasing after Harley. Luckily, Harley simply decided to stop running and turn and come to Michael. He was able to get him back to the house and in to the kitchen and back to work all before a 2:30 client call… Pretty impressive!
Enter me.
That evening I arrive at Michael’s house, before he does, to find that while in the kitchen again the dogs of gotten into the trash, shredded and distributed it all over the place, AND eaten 5 months worth of Heartguard. Fun…
If I didn’t love them like they were my children…. I’d hate them… :0)
The One with the Entire Month of May WASTED….
So we are quickly approaching the middle of June and it has been quite some time since I have blogged! There are quite a few reasons for this, but mainly because Michael’s computer just quit working! So for that lovely month of May that I had “off” I felt completely disconnected from the world! It was a special occasion when he let me use his work computer to check Facebook and email, but sadly my daily dose of Perez Hilton was banned … wah…wah…
Anyways, so that ambitious list you see below of what I wanted to accomplish in May – rubbish… all of it…. I didn’t do a single one of the items I planned to do. I didn’t even pick up a book, let alone finish that entire list. As for the losing weight item – this will be a life long battle. No matter how badly I want to lose weight there always seems to some event that comes up that is more important at the time and allows me to say “after [insert event] I will begin my diet.” Well I have been saying this for probably 13 of my almost 26 years on this planet and clearly that day after never comes….
What is really sad though is that I absolutely cannot remember what I did with those lovely three weeks that I had off. Apparently nothing productive… That’s the problem with time off. Many productive things are planned and scheduled, but because it is “time off” nothing gets done….at least with me… am I alone here???
What I do remember from this lackadaisical stint is that Michael and I had a very serious and life changing “emotional discussion.” I won’t bore you with the nitty gritty details but it resulted in us deciding that even though it stinks right now, what is best for our relationship in the long run is that I move out. Back to my apartment (in the ghetto…) that I share with my brother – and for the next 3 months his girlfriend too. Whoopie….I hope that you can hear my sarcasm in that sentence. Again I won’t bore with the why’s and why not’s, but as much as I am not happy about it, I do think it is a good thing. It feels like we are dating again, which is fun! I mean for the past six months, let’s face it, we were “playing house,” acting like the old married couple I have no doubt we will be one day. Everything had become routine and mundane and just felt kinda blah. I think it’s because we were both living with a guilty conscience knowing that if our families knew we were living together it would NOT go over well. Don’t confuse the issue though – this is merely for appearances and our parents’ sakes. I was very happy doing the boring and mundane routine with Michael. That’s what made it so hard. All the typical, boring stuff I was doing with him… I now do alone. I miss it. But I suppose that will just make married life (God willing we get there) all that much more to look forward to….
So after we spent a week in Hilton Head with his family I packed up all of my stuff and moved back into the apartment. It was timed pretty well I think because the next day I started my new job. So it wasn’t like a major change in my life – it was more like starting completely over with a whole new life!
Not to mention I don’t live with my boys anymore…. More to come on them later…
Anyways, so that ambitious list you see below of what I wanted to accomplish in May – rubbish… all of it…. I didn’t do a single one of the items I planned to do. I didn’t even pick up a book, let alone finish that entire list. As for the losing weight item – this will be a life long battle. No matter how badly I want to lose weight there always seems to some event that comes up that is more important at the time and allows me to say “after [insert event] I will begin my diet.” Well I have been saying this for probably 13 of my almost 26 years on this planet and clearly that day after never comes….
What is really sad though is that I absolutely cannot remember what I did with those lovely three weeks that I had off. Apparently nothing productive… That’s the problem with time off. Many productive things are planned and scheduled, but because it is “time off” nothing gets done….at least with me… am I alone here???
What I do remember from this lackadaisical stint is that Michael and I had a very serious and life changing “emotional discussion.” I won’t bore you with the nitty gritty details but it resulted in us deciding that even though it stinks right now, what is best for our relationship in the long run is that I move out. Back to my apartment (in the ghetto…) that I share with my brother – and for the next 3 months his girlfriend too. Whoopie….I hope that you can hear my sarcasm in that sentence. Again I won’t bore with the why’s and why not’s, but as much as I am not happy about it, I do think it is a good thing. It feels like we are dating again, which is fun! I mean for the past six months, let’s face it, we were “playing house,” acting like the old married couple I have no doubt we will be one day. Everything had become routine and mundane and just felt kinda blah. I think it’s because we were both living with a guilty conscience knowing that if our families knew we were living together it would NOT go over well. Don’t confuse the issue though – this is merely for appearances and our parents’ sakes. I was very happy doing the boring and mundane routine with Michael. That’s what made it so hard. All the typical, boring stuff I was doing with him… I now do alone. I miss it. But I suppose that will just make married life (God willing we get there) all that much more to look forward to….
So after we spent a week in Hilton Head with his family I packed up all of my stuff and moved back into the apartment. It was timed pretty well I think because the next day I started my new job. So it wasn’t like a major change in my life – it was more like starting completely over with a whole new life!
Not to mention I don’t live with my boys anymore…. More to come on them later…
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